"Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints." ~David
While working hospice, I inevitably had to say goodbye to my friends. As they stepped through the door to heaven, the last thing I told them was that I was a tad jealous. "Barring any accidents, they were going to see Jesus first and could they please give him a hug for me." My comment was usually rewarded with a chuckle and has been the last conversation I've had with many. The Lord turned this around on me a couple months ago.
I had trouble sleeping when my husband was going in for surgery, while he was in surgery and during his recovery. During that time, I met a photographer from New York online. Over four years, we developed a friendship while we were both learning about photography. He prayed for my husband every time he went into surgery and kept the conversations light and fun. He'd post pictures of his family, his boys playing soccer, his marbles, ballerinas and other random shots. I was really looking forward to someday meeting him and his wife. A couple of months ago though, he died of a massive heart attack. I was stunned.
Going to the Lord, I prayed, "Jesus... I'm a tad jealous of you right now. You got to see Timothy first! Will you please give him a hug for me!" See you later my friend, I miss you.
Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?" ~John 11:25
Tuesday, June 10, 2014
Monday, June 9, 2014
Numbered Days
"Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom" ~Moses
I've always wanted a heart of wisdom so I prayed this song. Teach me to number my days aright, oh Lord! My personality is such that I have no concept of the passing of time. Everything is in the "now" and if not, it must've happened last week. Days flow into months and months into years before I catch up. I must admit when I prayed this prayer, I was totally stumped as to how the Lord was going to get the passing of time through to me. I began to watch for his teaching. As usual, he used something totally unexpected. A bag of goo and two pages of instructions for its care.
I was "blessed" with an Amish Friendship bread start. With two pages of how to care for this obnoxious little blob, I decided to name it. It was obviously a boy so I named it Fred. Fred the Bread. After three days of resting, Fred had to be squeezed every day. On the sixth day, he had to be fed. Back to squeezing until the tenth day when he had to be baked. Since it was a yeast bread that called for sugar, he had to be burped every once in awhile to keep him from exploding. I kid you not. This meant that I have to number the days and have a bake day every ten days. I squirmed under the control. Ten days goes by really fast and what if I didn't want to bake that day or something more fun came along to do? It forced me to plan. Do I have every thing I need to bake that day? When was I going to get what was lacking?
You may laugh but the control that little baggy had over my life became extremely irritating! I started to plot Fred's last bake day. After all, I learned the lesson ... Yeah, yeah... number my days. He'd be gone by Father's Day. Well, long story short: my husband had grown quite attached to Fred. It seems they enjoy second breakfast every day and he didn't want to put an end to that. So, my lesson continues as does the adventures of Fred the Bread. I've resigned myself to the routine of taking care of Fred and realized that numbering my days must be very important to the Lord. So important that he's not going to let me squirm out from under the answer to my prayer. Yes, that bag of goo was and still is an answer to prayer. I just wonder how long I have to keep baking before I get that heart of wisdom!
"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." ~James
I've always wanted a heart of wisdom so I prayed this song. Teach me to number my days aright, oh Lord! My personality is such that I have no concept of the passing of time. Everything is in the "now" and if not, it must've happened last week. Days flow into months and months into years before I catch up. I must admit when I prayed this prayer, I was totally stumped as to how the Lord was going to get the passing of time through to me. I began to watch for his teaching. As usual, he used something totally unexpected. A bag of goo and two pages of instructions for its care.
I was "blessed" with an Amish Friendship bread start. With two pages of how to care for this obnoxious little blob, I decided to name it. It was obviously a boy so I named it Fred. Fred the Bread. After three days of resting, Fred had to be squeezed every day. On the sixth day, he had to be fed. Back to squeezing until the tenth day when he had to be baked. Since it was a yeast bread that called for sugar, he had to be burped every once in awhile to keep him from exploding. I kid you not. This meant that I have to number the days and have a bake day every ten days. I squirmed under the control. Ten days goes by really fast and what if I didn't want to bake that day or something more fun came along to do? It forced me to plan. Do I have every thing I need to bake that day? When was I going to get what was lacking?
You may laugh but the control that little baggy had over my life became extremely irritating! I started to plot Fred's last bake day. After all, I learned the lesson ... Yeah, yeah... number my days. He'd be gone by Father's Day. Well, long story short: my husband had grown quite attached to Fred. It seems they enjoy second breakfast every day and he didn't want to put an end to that. So, my lesson continues as does the adventures of Fred the Bread. I've resigned myself to the routine of taking care of Fred and realized that numbering my days must be very important to the Lord. So important that he's not going to let me squirm out from under the answer to my prayer. Yes, that bag of goo was and still is an answer to prayer. I just wonder how long I have to keep baking before I get that heart of wisdom!
"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." ~James
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
Trashy Neighbors
"Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord." ~Leviticus 19:18
Every time I drive down the roads in my neighborhood, they are strewn with trash. I'm constantly distracted by the espresso cups floating in the frogs pond and the plastic water bottles riding the streams into the creek that the herd of deer drink from. Even the trees seem resolved to have beer can encrusted roots. They droop sadly towards the creek on the hillside while the ferns struggle to push through plastic bags. Nothing irritates me as much as someone who litters. I began to hold a grudge against the people polluting their own neighborhoods. I began to want revenge against those trashy neighbors who could possibly be that selfish. I began to pray for them: Especially the one that drinks Icehouse beer and eats cup-of-noodle soup. Grrrr....
Revelation struck one day as I was driving and grumbling to the Lord about the garbage. The Lord said, "You do it. Love your neighbor as yourself" It was clear that it was a conviction as in "you've littered too" and a command as in, "show me your love for your neighbors. Pick it up". After stalling a few days I grabbed my walking stick and a trash bag and began picking up all those offensive scraps of plastic and foam on the side of the road. I spent the time praying for the families that live in the houses on the other side of the path of trash. I realized it truly is a tangible way for me to love my neighbors as myself. Now when I drive down the road, I scope out the next stretch that needs to be freed from the rubbish and praise God for how beautiful it will be!
Jesus replied, "'Do not murder, do not commit adultery, do not steal, do not give false testimony, honor your father and mother,' and 'love your neighbor as yourself."'
Every time I drive down the roads in my neighborhood, they are strewn with trash. I'm constantly distracted by the espresso cups floating in the frogs pond and the plastic water bottles riding the streams into the creek that the herd of deer drink from. Even the trees seem resolved to have beer can encrusted roots. They droop sadly towards the creek on the hillside while the ferns struggle to push through plastic bags. Nothing irritates me as much as someone who litters. I began to hold a grudge against the people polluting their own neighborhoods. I began to want revenge against those trashy neighbors who could possibly be that selfish. I began to pray for them: Especially the one that drinks Icehouse beer and eats cup-of-noodle soup. Grrrr....
Revelation struck one day as I was driving and grumbling to the Lord about the garbage. The Lord said, "You do it. Love your neighbor as yourself" It was clear that it was a conviction as in "you've littered too" and a command as in, "show me your love for your neighbors. Pick it up". After stalling a few days I grabbed my walking stick and a trash bag and began picking up all those offensive scraps of plastic and foam on the side of the road. I spent the time praying for the families that live in the houses on the other side of the path of trash. I realized it truly is a tangible way for me to love my neighbors as myself. Now when I drive down the road, I scope out the next stretch that needs to be freed from the rubbish and praise God for how beautiful it will be!
Jesus replied, "'Do not murder, do not commit adultery, do not steal, do not give false testimony, honor your father and mother,' and 'love your neighbor as yourself."'
Thursday, January 30, 2014
Talk and Walk
"How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them?" ~Paul
The Spirit of God keeps drawing me back to these questions of Paul's. My mind brushes on the musings carefully, like fingers on the wing of a butterfly. And just like the butterfly, I get grounded by mere contact. Jesus is trying to teach me something and I know it's something I'm uncomfortable with by the fact that I'm trying to spiritualize it. I've become a silent witness for him.
If people have not heard about Jesus, how can they believe in him? I can spiritualize this all I want and it still won't take away my responsibility to TALK about Jesus. His words should be like fire in my bones that I cannot stop from raging forth into the world. They are the light that draws God's children out of darkness and into peace with our heavenly Father. There is a famine on the earth right now, it's a famine for hearing the word of the Lord. Could it be because I've been duped into believing a lie? The "lie" being that people will "hear" about Jesus with their "spiritual ears" just by watching how I live my life. Or they will see my joy and cross necklace and somehow make the connection, realize they're sinners and repent and be saved? How many times have I heard, "You have to walk the talk"? That's nice but I need to "talk while I walk"!
"These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up." ~God
The Spirit of God keeps drawing me back to these questions of Paul's. My mind brushes on the musings carefully, like fingers on the wing of a butterfly. And just like the butterfly, I get grounded by mere contact. Jesus is trying to teach me something and I know it's something I'm uncomfortable with by the fact that I'm trying to spiritualize it. I've become a silent witness for him.
If people have not heard about Jesus, how can they believe in him? I can spiritualize this all I want and it still won't take away my responsibility to TALK about Jesus. His words should be like fire in my bones that I cannot stop from raging forth into the world. They are the light that draws God's children out of darkness and into peace with our heavenly Father. There is a famine on the earth right now, it's a famine for hearing the word of the Lord. Could it be because I've been duped into believing a lie? The "lie" being that people will "hear" about Jesus with their "spiritual ears" just by watching how I live my life. Or they will see my joy and cross necklace and somehow make the connection, realize they're sinners and repent and be saved? How many times have I heard, "You have to walk the talk"? That's nice but I need to "talk while I walk"!
"These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up." ~God
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Why Cry?
The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman' for she was taken out of man." For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
My husband had a knee replaced yesterday. It was during the preparations for the surgery that I realized just how "one flesh" he and I are. I had to laugh when it dawned on me that every time a needle was stuck in his arm, I winced. When the stethoscope was placed on his back, I drew in the deep breaths right along with him. When they wheeled him out of sight, I held back the tears until I was safely in the car on the way home. I felt like I had left the best part of myself entrusted to doctors.
Pouring out my fears to the Lord in a deluge, the Spirit quietly waited for me to finish laying out all my cares before Him. Then He asked, "Why are you crying?" I was taken aback. Why WAS I crying? Immediately, the words from the maskil of the Sons of Korah came singing into my mind. I was not entrusting my man to doctors: I had prayerfully placed him in the capable hands of his creator and savior. My God!
"Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my savior and my God." ~Sons of Korah
My husband had a knee replaced yesterday. It was during the preparations for the surgery that I realized just how "one flesh" he and I are. I had to laugh when it dawned on me that every time a needle was stuck in his arm, I winced. When the stethoscope was placed on his back, I drew in the deep breaths right along with him. When they wheeled him out of sight, I held back the tears until I was safely in the car on the way home. I felt like I had left the best part of myself entrusted to doctors.
Pouring out my fears to the Lord in a deluge, the Spirit quietly waited for me to finish laying out all my cares before Him. Then He asked, "Why are you crying?" I was taken aback. Why WAS I crying? Immediately, the words from the maskil of the Sons of Korah came singing into my mind. I was not entrusting my man to doctors: I had prayerfully placed him in the capable hands of his creator and savior. My God!
"Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my savior and my God." ~Sons of Korah
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Ordinary Birth
"While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn." ~Luke
I've been meditating on the birth of Jesus and have come to the conclusion that it was very ordinary. The time came for the baby to be born and just like women for centuries have done, Mary laid down where she could and had him. I used to think that was awful circumstances to give birth until I read accounts of women having their babies in taxis, mud huts, and on the side of the road. Bus drivers, firemen, police officers and strangers have delivered children throughout the centuries. When the time comes, it doesn't matter where you're at or who is there with you, that baby's born!
I'd be willing to bet that Mary was happy to have any sort of shelter but God provided a stable outside an inn. Surrounded by the fresh smell of hay and the musky scent of warm animals, it was the perfect place for the lamb of God to enter the world. Just like babies all over the world, they wrapped him in cloth to keep him warm. The well wishers showed up in the form of shepherds which was only fitting. They brought no gifts but the word of their testimony concerning the child. As far as the people in the inn were concerned, they could've been her family.
His parents treasured his birth in their hearts just as I treasure the births of my children in mine. I often wonder how many times Mary and Joseph looked at Jesus and said, "He must get that from his father!"
"...And the child grew and became strong; he was filled with wisdom, and the grace of God was upon him." ~Luke
I've been meditating on the birth of Jesus and have come to the conclusion that it was very ordinary. The time came for the baby to be born and just like women for centuries have done, Mary laid down where she could and had him. I used to think that was awful circumstances to give birth until I read accounts of women having their babies in taxis, mud huts, and on the side of the road. Bus drivers, firemen, police officers and strangers have delivered children throughout the centuries. When the time comes, it doesn't matter where you're at or who is there with you, that baby's born!
I'd be willing to bet that Mary was happy to have any sort of shelter but God provided a stable outside an inn. Surrounded by the fresh smell of hay and the musky scent of warm animals, it was the perfect place for the lamb of God to enter the world. Just like babies all over the world, they wrapped him in cloth to keep him warm. The well wishers showed up in the form of shepherds which was only fitting. They brought no gifts but the word of their testimony concerning the child. As far as the people in the inn were concerned, they could've been her family.
His parents treasured his birth in their hearts just as I treasure the births of my children in mine. I often wonder how many times Mary and Joseph looked at Jesus and said, "He must get that from his father!"
"...And the child grew and became strong; he was filled with wisdom, and the grace of God was upon him." ~Luke
Friday, January 3, 2014
Messy Hearts
Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."
I adore sparkly things and I abhor wasting any thing so it came as no surprise to me that glitter glue would be used by God to teach me a valuable lesson this past holiday season.
I attended a birthday party for Jesus last month. A giant birthday card was set up and each person could take a cutout heart and decorate it with stickers, sequins, felt-tip pens and glitter glue in glorious colors! I set about gluing sequins, scoping out the gold glitter glue, and writing my name on my heart for the card. My art zone was infringed upon by a girl of about eight or nine years old. She too was after the various glitter glues. I cringed as she grabbed each tube and squeezed half the glue out onto the little heart and it almost physically hurt when she asked me for help securing the various colors. My eyeballs were twitching after three colors. "What a waste of glitter glue," I mumbled. I confess, I picked up my heart and walked away.
It wasn't long before she was behind me in the line to have our hearts put on the birthday card for Jesus. Her soggy little heart lay across her palms and threatened to tear as she presented it to be hung. She was careful to make sure they knew just where to hang it when it dried and skipped off to play pin the tail on the donkey, oblivious to my pain.
I scurried off to tune my guitar and count books that were to be passed out as party favors. While doing so, the Spirit nudged me and reminded me that the kingdom of heaven belongs to children such as this and asked why glitter glue was so important to me when the little girl was to him. She had answered his invite to his party and he loves her little messy heart.
What a wonderful gift to hear all the children of God at the party sing "Yes, Jesus Loves Me!" after having my heart cleaned up. What fun for me to join in and belt out the song with a new conviction of how true it really is. Messy hearts and all.
"The Lord their God will save them on that day as the flock of his people. They will sparkle in his land like jewels in a crown." ~Zechariah
I adore sparkly things and I abhor wasting any thing so it came as no surprise to me that glitter glue would be used by God to teach me a valuable lesson this past holiday season.
I attended a birthday party for Jesus last month. A giant birthday card was set up and each person could take a cutout heart and decorate it with stickers, sequins, felt-tip pens and glitter glue in glorious colors! I set about gluing sequins, scoping out the gold glitter glue, and writing my name on my heart for the card. My art zone was infringed upon by a girl of about eight or nine years old. She too was after the various glitter glues. I cringed as she grabbed each tube and squeezed half the glue out onto the little heart and it almost physically hurt when she asked me for help securing the various colors. My eyeballs were twitching after three colors. "What a waste of glitter glue," I mumbled. I confess, I picked up my heart and walked away.
It wasn't long before she was behind me in the line to have our hearts put on the birthday card for Jesus. Her soggy little heart lay across her palms and threatened to tear as she presented it to be hung. She was careful to make sure they knew just where to hang it when it dried and skipped off to play pin the tail on the donkey, oblivious to my pain.
I scurried off to tune my guitar and count books that were to be passed out as party favors. While doing so, the Spirit nudged me and reminded me that the kingdom of heaven belongs to children such as this and asked why glitter glue was so important to me when the little girl was to him. She had answered his invite to his party and he loves her little messy heart.
What a wonderful gift to hear all the children of God at the party sing "Yes, Jesus Loves Me!" after having my heart cleaned up. What fun for me to join in and belt out the song with a new conviction of how true it really is. Messy hearts and all.
"The Lord their God will save them on that day as the flock of his people. They will sparkle in his land like jewels in a crown." ~Zechariah
Thursday, January 2, 2014
Renewing Your Mind
"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things." ~Paul
I revisit this exercise at least once a year because no other verse has given me more peace over the years than this one. I am free to think about anything I want so instead of dwelling on the dark things and circumstances in life, I can choose to see and meditate on the good things. When I stumbled upon this verse in Philippians years ago, I began to apply it to my family.
I wrote down the words; true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy in a notebook. Then, I began by applying the words to myself. What is a true statement about myself? The Holy Spirit whispered, "I love you!" Honestly, I giggled as words Jesus had spoken danced out of my memory and although I was alone, I'm sure I blushed. After each answer, I would thank the Lord for providing the answers and for the answers themselves.
My husband was next and each of my children. By practicing retraining my thought-life on myself, I had begun to think about them through these lenses of peace. I found myself filled with joy and inexplicable wonder. I challenge anyone who reads this to do this exercise this month. May the love and peace of God guard your homes, hearts and minds!
"The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control." ~Paul
I revisit this exercise at least once a year because no other verse has given me more peace over the years than this one. I am free to think about anything I want so instead of dwelling on the dark things and circumstances in life, I can choose to see and meditate on the good things. When I stumbled upon this verse in Philippians years ago, I began to apply it to my family.
I wrote down the words; true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy in a notebook. Then, I began by applying the words to myself. What is a true statement about myself? The Holy Spirit whispered, "I love you!" Honestly, I giggled as words Jesus had spoken danced out of my memory and although I was alone, I'm sure I blushed. After each answer, I would thank the Lord for providing the answers and for the answers themselves.
My husband was next and each of my children. By practicing retraining my thought-life on myself, I had begun to think about them through these lenses of peace. I found myself filled with joy and inexplicable wonder. I challenge anyone who reads this to do this exercise this month. May the love and peace of God guard your homes, hearts and minds!
"The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control." ~Paul
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